Calling All Lovers of Lars' Poetry

Ah, my two followers, and however many secret stalkers I have who may be reading this, the time has come for a very important event.

I have entered a poetry contest. Because it involves Billy Collins.

If you don't know about my Billy Collins obsession, do not fear. I'll share! But first, pretty pretty please click here, and create an account (if you don't have a figment.com account that is) and "heart" my poem. The top ten will be read and judged by Billy Collins. I am definitely not giggling in excitement every time I think about that.

See, my love for this American poet began with an animal issue. Yes. It all goes back to my animal problems, doesn't it?

My neighbors had this poor, neglected, mean old mangy dalmatian named Jake. He was about 1000 years old, and he could not stop barking. Ever. It was as if he literally had to make noise to survive. I seriously have never hated a dog so much as that one. He would growl if you looked at him over the fence, and whine if he was feeling particularly sorry for himself.

Then one day, my aunt, who is a writer herself, came to visit. Jake was displeased. My aunt, upon hearing the dog we'd all complained so much about, directed our attention to the copy of Sailing Alone Around the Room by the fireplace and read aloud Another Reason Why I Don't Keep A Gun in the House.

A year later, I met Mr. Collins at a poetry lecture at the library. I was 11. The rest, as they say, is history.